Grow without disappearing
Does anyone else disconnect in order to reconnect with themselves?
For me, “locking in” has always looked like isolation. I convince myself that if I really want to focus on my goals, I need to disappear for a while, step away from my social life, stop going out, stop saying yes.
Invite me, but I’m probably not coming.
Somewhere between the dinners, birthday celebrations, catch-ups, and endless plans, I start to lose myself. Maybe it’s not my social life that’s the issue, though. Maybe it’s my lack of balance.
Because ultimately, I want to create a life I don’t feel the need to disconnect from, one that supports my growth instead of competing with it.
There’s a quote that says, “Show me your daily habits and I’ll show you your future.”
And honestly? The ten-minute TikTok scrolls during the workday, the scrolling after work, and the scrolling before bed might be a good place to start. The thing is, I’m not doing nothing. I read. I listen to podcasts. I have a 60-day Duolingo streak. I go to Pilates 3 days a week. I read my Bible every day.
Yet somehow, I still feel behind. Like I need to “lock in.”
There are only so many hours in the day, and I constantly wonder how people maximize them all.
I place a lot of pressure on myself to succeed and perform at the highest level. But in the pursuit of that, I sometimes become overwhelmed, distracted, or drained. There’s always something happening. A birthday, a marathon, an engagement, a wedding, a baby shower. Sometimes it feels like life is happening to me instead of for me.
But today, in this moment, I realize there’s both progress and room for growth.
I once heard a creator say: “Live your life tired.”
That stuck with me.
We go to work tired and still complete our responsibilities. Yet somehow, when it comes to the things that would actually improve our own lives, we tell ourselves we’re too exhausted.
Maybe we deserve to pour into ourselves with that same level of commitment.
Even writing this, I’m realizing I don’t need to “fall back” in order to “fall in line.” Maybe the better alternative is leaning further into the life I actually want.
Life shouldn’t just be work, sleep, and eating. It should be felt. It should be vibrant, intentional, and curated with love, joy, purpose, and kindness.
Maybe we think we need to push people away in order to answer our calling because we haven’t consistently poured into ourselves. We become so drained that all we have energy left for is scrolling, binge-watching, or checking out completely.
And honestly, there’s nothing wrong with those things when there’s balance.
Maybe we’re allowed to work toward our goals tired.
Maybe growth doesn’t require isolation.
I’ve noticed that whenever I finally do the thing I’ve been avoiding: folding the clothes that have been sitting in the basket for weeks, answering the email, starting the workout, making the call. It’s rarely as bad as I imagined. The anticipation and avoidance are usually worse than the task itself.
So how much of life are we delaying simply because we dread doing hard things?
I hope you give yourself permission to grow without disappearing.
And I hope you soar.
Thanks for reading.
Fahr in Heights💫
The Height 